Five minute gardening jobs for Christmas sanity

I know I know, it’s nearly Christmas. You’ve got all that stuff STILL to do, and all that stuff STILL to buy, and everything’s just too much. I know.



It might seem odd to think of venturing out into the garden or balcony right now, and you’re right, it goes against all our thousands of years of human programming, which tells us very clearly that if we find a warm safe place to hide out from the elements, we should stay put for as long as possible, until, that is, we get hungry, at which point, we’re going to need to venture out in search of food. The trouble is that because our warm safe place these days is home, where food is plentiful; we need never go outside at all.


That lovely warm feeling you get once you’ve been for a walk after an enormous Christmas lunch? THAT feeling is the golden one, where you’ve moved your body and cleared your mind. When you pick up a rake, or a spade, or a trowel, you not only get outside and clear your mind, but you maintain your outside space as well…BONUS! - it’s basically like going to the gym and when you get back you find that your garden has been tidied. Never has the hashtag #winwin been more apt.


So in the spirit of “I REALLLLY REALLLLLY REALLLLY don’t wanna go outside today, here are my top three, maximum payback, blow-out-the-cobwebs, I-am-a-total-god(DESS) five minute jobs for December. 


1. Rush out, pick up a trowel, pick a small piece of earth, or a couple of containers (whatever you’ve got) brush any leaves away, remove any weeds that you see, and chop off any unsightly dead stuff. Keep your eyes on this one spot, do NOT look at the rest of the garden or any of the other pots until you’ve finished this one area. Once you’ve finished, either go inside or (and this is the more likely scenario) move on to the next bit.



2. Get some bulbs (tulips, alliums, crocus, irises…whatever takes your fancy) and quickly plant as many as possible in five minutes, using either a bulb planter, or a trowel. Once you’ve finished, either go inside or (and this is the more likely scenario) plant some more bulbs.



3. Grab a broom and sweep your paths, or if you don’t have paths, sweep your patio, or your steps for five minutes. Pick up all the leaves and either scatter them between the plants in your flowerbeds or bag them up into a plastic bag, punch some holes into it and store it somewhere out of the way to make leaf mould.  Once you’ve finished, either go inside or (and this is the more likely scenario) do some more sweeping. 


Have a truly peaceful Christmas everyone...see you on the other side!

xx Laetitia

Bunny tails, realised

Just a quick one to show you those bunny tails I planted with Babety way back when. ...Yet another illustration of the fact that plants will pretty much grow, no matter what you do, or DON'T do to them. which I mean:

that the seeds were less scattered than plonked

that the watering was slapdash, and sporadic

that the whole thing dried out to a crisp during the heatwave

that the plastic tub was dropped, and up-ended, and the contents splattered all over the floor, and had to be shoved back into place...MORE THAN ONCE.


...and, no doubt, more felonies that I am conveniently forgetting to get my drift.

I have never met a plant with such exquisite feel-appeal. I wish I had sowed squillions....for my garden.

Hey, you!...yes YOU!

My publishers have produced a calendar...and very pretty it is too. It's to get people in the mood for my book, which will be out in March...

...Would you like one? Or two? Or three?

I've got hold of some and I thought I'd sell them for charity.

It's a useful piece of kit...You'll never turn up to work on a bank holiday, or forget Valentine's day with one of these babies.

Be warned, it does have my mug on the front, but that's the bit that faces the wall when you've hung it up, so phew, basically.

Just donate what you want by clicking the button below (minimum donation of £3 per calendar please, to cover my costs), then email me (Laetitia AT with your postal address and how many calendars you want, and I'll send one out to you quick-sticks!

I'll be sending the profits to RSPCA who help animals out of truly hideous situations, so please give's Christmas.


...and if you've never, ever shared or re-tweeted or told someone about a post before...then please make this your first time...I'd love to raise LOTS of money for this wonderful charity xxx